Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Nail Art!

Looks like unknown or foreign greek letters upsidedown! :)

Results of watching Orphan Black

The girl was delusional. She moved slowly as if she would jump and pounce at any second. Like a tiger. Preying. Hunting. She wore a smile that never wavered. Her hair was a dried and confused. She was locked in her room. Was. That was earlier. She snuckout from a hole she made under the floor boards. Now? She was holding my knife, playfully drawing invisible swirls and loops infront of Dan. Her other hand held the knife Dan had gotten to defend himself. The two were on top of the staircase in front on me. She knew I was there, but only spoke to him. He was in shock, unable to move and just willing the girl to go away with silent word running theough his heart, mind, and body. Me? I stood there, a new knife in my hand. I look to the girl and don't take my eye off. I had to think fast, act faster. That was the only way. My muscles were tense. My heart was... I couldn't even feel was it was doing - my mind so focused on getting this right. I had to get it right. I was scared stiff of just thinking what the knife would feel like when she jabs it into my arm. My shoulder. It was anyone's guess where she would jab me with it. I just knew she'd attack me if I made a move and gave her time to think about it. But if I stood here forever, halfway up the staircase, she would get tired. She'd start carving Into Dan. Me. Herself. Though ha! Would that be grand if she cut herself instead? My problem would be gone. But no. I couldn't take the chance.

I walked up cautiously. Then struck. Aimed for her head. It was the only way I could think of that would slow her down and not give her time to ignore the wound and attack someone else. But my missed. My knife slid off her skull. The girl didn't yelp or scream or jump. She moved her head one side then swung it slowly it slowly towards me and her blank malicious eyes stared at me and dared me to strike again. After the first attempt my arm just felt weak. I started to doubt myself. Tried to rethink what was wrong. Couldn't find anything. Maybe I didn't strike hard enough? My angle was wrong? I didn't anticipate the skull being so hard? She has a thick head? I genuinely didn't have the power to stab a knife into a head no matter the importance. I knew if I didn't finish up my thinking and didn't start doing SOMETHING, I would be the one with a knife in my head. Or worse, a knife in my heart, gut, or somewhere with voluntary muscles. She widens her smile, moves her hand toward me, and before she could jump, my fear took ahold of me and without thinking my knife goes up and back down into her head. I felt the knife as it sliced through the thin layer of soft flesh, cracked her skull, and made it into the brain. I let go as soon as I realized what I was doing and stared in horror. Part in horror, part in relief, part in shock, part in fear of what could entail. The girl was swaying still smiling. Dan was still, unmoving, still in the same position he'd been in for the past 5minutes. I was slowly backing away, wanting to run away and not waiting around to see if she'd jump up and attack, but also too scared to turn my back on what I'd just done.

I finally looked at where is wounded the girl for the first time. It wasn't perfectly in the middle of her head it didn't go straight down and beautifully fit in like in movies. This was in the side of her head near the front and instead of going through pure brains like it felt like, it looked like it just skimmed the brain, landing along the inside if the skull. Now I was scared I hadn't hurt her enough and her mental state led her to ignore the injury. But thankfully, I was wrong. She slowly laid her self down and rested her head on Dans chest, the blood now staining her hair and the knife sticking out in Dans ace. I started to breath normally. I relaxed. I saw Dan still tense and I saw his unwavering eyes drawn to her. Finally her looked to me, and breathed a sigh of relief and slumped back on the ground. With the girl dead on top of him, the knife jutting out of her head, him laying down on top of the stairs with one leg down the stairs, he looked pretty dead himself. Except when you saw his eyes wide and blinking with joy.

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Squirrel from 2012

Another Ferrero Rocher Creature...
Bushy tails
Flounce flounce flounce
Nut over here, Nuts over there
Round and round the squirrles all go
stop and wonder,
How do I know?

Monday, April 15, 2013

Fresh Out

She's lost
fresh out of high school and lost
Good intentions,
Mediocre grades
Enormous effort
She asks, "How?"
No plans no goals.
No inkling of a future
Always needing otherrs,
Always wanting to be needed
Broken trust in the world.
Too careful with life and still
No signs of light
Loves what she can't have.
Art, music,
Writing and talent.
Books, movies, stories of it all.
She wants what she doesn't have.
Pity upon herself,
Praying she can be like others.
Wanting to tell others
"I can't."
Wishing for a life to come by.
She askes one thing
"Help me."
But they can't can they?
Ultimately, it's all down to her
the job, the work, the classes
All her.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013


It's engrained
in my Brain
It's me
my personality
I couldn't just shake it loose
even if I wanted to
What the hell do you mean?
Just change how I think?
I don't think there exists
such a button or switch.
I need it though
I waant it now,
Please, tell me how?

Friday, April 5, 2013

How Easy...

Frightening really.
Death? No, not quite.
Being bludgeoned to death?
Not that either,
Though that is intimidating.
The scariest thing?
How easy it is to hurt someone.
Some thing.
How fragile the world around us
Really is.
How simple thoughts
lead to actions that
Can ultimately destroy others.
If I drove off a cliff,
Who's really going to stop me?
If I wanted to slit someone's throat,
how would they know to avoid me?
If I wanted to trash a room,
What's preventing me from doing so?
Nothing. No one.
Not a thing in the world can stop us if we are alone.
When no one's watching.
When no one knows.
Nothing can stop us.
No one can stop me.
If I had a curious idea to cut off a finger,
Who's to stop me from doing so?

Our mind is a wondrous and amazing thing.
Not just in the intelligence
And potential it holds,
But also for all the dark and malicious thoughts
That form every so often.
We may not always act on them,
But the ideas are there.
It takes so
Much effort just to hold
Back the urge to fulfill our curiosities.
Animal instincts.
We have them sure.
But we got so much more.
Animals act on survival and luxury.
Maybe once or twice discovery
Of something curious
But never an idea that hurts for the fun of it.
Nothing psychotic.
Psychosis? That's only for the human brain.
There's no cure, despite how much
We may try to deceive ourselves.