My out-of-the-blue Cold

Aching skin, freezing hands, what more could there be?
Swollen throat, pounding headache, please don't you dare tell me.
Chills down my spine, stiff aching neck, I'm wearing a winter coat for cryin' out loud!
Dry sweat, heated body, I can't lose that heat.
I need it, I NEEED it,
Don't take my body heat from me.
I've become light sensitive now?
I walk like I have a neck brace?
I get to bed like I'm elderly too?
Burning pee, icy toilet seat, why oh why ME?!
I can't run because the pounding will start up
I can't shake my head or my brains will swash n' buckle over seas
I can't move my head down or the .00001 pressure change will kill me.
I can't even shiver or my clothes will let in a draft
I can't move
I can't eat
I can't even sleep
This isn't mono, oh ho, No.
This isn't the flu, God bless you.
It couldn't be the cold -- I haven't been THAT bold.
I dress warm and eat right and wash my hands whenever I could.
It started as a sore throat but this can't be all it is.
So what, you tell me what
What have I'z got, eh?

--The cold.
Darn.--